Here’s my first conclusion after going through the many, many comments on Untemplater:
Everyone wants to know.
They want to know how to do everything so that they can make the transition without turbulence.
Well, I got news: you are not supposed to know.
No one does, really. Even those very accomplished gurus have no idea what will work next. And it’s ok, because knowledge is not what will decide if you make the change in your life or not. It’s not about information, it’s about fear. If information were the problem, we would see a lot more people living the life they want, because you can sell information.
You can’t sell courage.
Here’s the thing: you have to be willing to lose control. The world is ready for recipes, you need more than that to break free. You need to create your own recipes. What we can and will do is give you the ingredients, but you’ll have to do the actual cooking.
Don’t look for control. Lose it on purpose instead. Only by embracing the conflict, the disorder of emotions, you’ll arise with a strong character and a fulfilling decision.
Start mixing the ingredients, realize that you can’t taste a good meal until you cook it.
Have you ever felt the rush of not knowing, of not following?
There is still one thing that you do have to know before starting a business. How to make money. I’ve been thinking lately on a great idea of an information service in a completely un-filed niche. But I haven’t acted on it, because I have absolutely no idea how to make any money off of it. I supposed I could just do it as a hobby, and not worry about money, but it’s a project that will require a lot of time and probably some money in the form of resources.
Maybe, yes. But just because you know how to do that, it does not mean it’s going to work. And this advice is not just focused on the business side of life, it’s helpful whatever it is that you want to do.
True, that’s always the risk. But not having a way of making money is a guarantee of not making any money. Just ask all those dot com companies that went bust a decade ago.
I just wrote an article about the fact that you’ve gotta learn to become a risk taker in life if you want to achieve anything great. Anything worth doing comes with some level of risk. Weather it’s to your health, your finances, your career, reputation, etc.
Think about it, Martin Luther King risked his life to stand for civil liberties and ultimately paid the price. Was that risky? To be a black man challenging status quo? YES. Was it worth it, YES.
I can think of dozens of other examples and I’m sure you can too.
You can’t always be in control either. Just like with rock climbing, I set up all the ropes, and hope my equipment won’t fail or that I’ll get caught in a lightening storm. Ultimately however your not really in control when you’re on that wall.
Risk is relative, though. Those that were fired from oh so many banks two years ago made the “safe” decision. It’s exactly what you’re saying about control.
Thank you for saying it loud and clear for everyone! So many times I’ve asked myself, how come I don’t know what I’m doing and everyone else does? Well, I guess everyone is battling the same demon! Thanks Carlos.
You can beat him very easily with Scorpion and Sub-Zero.
“Don’t look for control. Lose it on purpose instead. Only by embracing the conflict, the disorder of emotions, you’ll arise with a strong character and a fulfilling decision.”
That was totally worth quoting.
I try my best to be quotable 😛
Dude, you nailed this one. You are exactly correct. So so right. Gah, really struck a chord with me since this is where I’m at: looking for recipes, paths, guides and how to do make this crazy change. It all boils down to courage.
Take a step that can’t be undone. You’ll find courage then.
Great post Carlos,
I have experienced the rush you you mention at the end…and it breeds courage. As most readers of this blog know, it doesn’t take a lot of courage to stick to the template. We either develop courage out of forced necessity (firing, etc) or through a conscience decision to embrace chaos, and knowing we will emerge better from it on the other end.
Makes you wonder, do you think there’s pros and cons to each way?
“Stop trying to control everything and just let go! LET GO!”
~Tyler Durden, Fight Club
This is what flashed in my mind while reading your post.
I need to watch that movie again, I don’t remember much…
There’s some great stuff out there about the control thing.
I jokingly refer to myself as a “recovering arrogant, overachieving perfectionist”. The first one (arrogance) is the belief that one has control, the second (overachievement) is the belief that it’s mostly as a result of your own actions (as opposed to a good bit of others’ support) and the perfectionism is the height of control-freakdom.
In the end, like you, I’ve learned that it just doesn’t work that way. The best we can do is create the environment for success, which is achieved (in my opinion) by meeting other people and helping them to live THEIR dream. Eventually it comes back — it ALWAYS comes back.
Reality rarely matches your desires. Reality matches reality, so you either work to change reality, or you desire what reality already has.
Sweet! Having transitioned my life from desk/office/cubicle to ‘freedom with sneakers’ more than ten years ago, I applaud your thoughts.
In a word…. Jump
Remember to roll when you land.
The message reminds me of the old-school zelda games.
“It’s a secret to everyone.” Someone has to kn ow what I’m talking about
Lol. It’s so true though.
But OOT was the best, though.
Thanks, Carlos!
As someone who has lived the “untemplater lifestyle” for almost twenty years (although I didn’t have this cool way to describe it back then!), I offer a couple of thoughts.
First, I get calls from people who want to leave their “corporate” gigs and become a “consultant” and they ask me for the recipe on how to do it. I always tell them that there is no single recipe. However, they need to be able to explain in one sentence what service they will provide or what they will do for a potential client in an easily understandable way.
Second, what blocks most people from taking the leap to this lifestyle is fear. Just keep in mind that “FEAR” is an acronym for “False Evidence Appearing Real”.
I love meeting people that have been doing that for years and don’t sell crap to their clients or friends. People that tell it like it is. Keep doing that John!
Perfect! I remember the first lap I ever did on an actual race track… I was so worried that day that I would only end up sucking, not getting better, having no clue what I was doing. Turned out to be the best day I’ve ever shared with my car, I learned so much and by the end of the day she and I were belting out laps like no other… I felt on top of the world, and the nerves I felt that morning were completely forgotten.
I always look back to that day when I’m worried about making an unsure leap. I don’t want to miss my chances anymore, because the only way you’ll know how it turns out is to chase the rabbit down the hole. No wimping out!
Most things worth doing aren’t easy, right?
Even if I don’t have a car or even know how to drive, your car fascination fascinates me.
Great post Carlos. You are so right. If there is one ingredient to living (or embarking on) the untemplated lifestyle, it would be COURAGE. And that’s not something that be easily handed off to someone.
My personal answer to the question you pose at the end is that whenever I’ve felt that rush of not knowing, I’ve become overtaken and paralyzed by fear. In order to overcome it, I try to look for inspiration in various places (including books and blogs like this one) and I try to look for the courage within myself.
The best way to find courage? Take a step that can’t be taken back. You’ll realize you already have courage, but you weren’t being pressured enough to release it.
This sounds like exactly what many (most) of us need to hear. A good swift kick and a “get off your butt.” Alas that doesn’t change the fact that it’s still the scariest thing I can think to do. We’ll call it an area of opportunity and hope that, before I’m officially approaching middle age, I can take this advice 🙂
I play a lot of soccer, I’m all for kicking.
Carlos, you are wise beyond your years. Nice post. Making the actual jump is downright scary – to go from researching and talking about something for months to actually handing in your resignation letter and doing is a whole new game. You’re out there living it – the safety net is gone. But, you are rewarded in so many ways.
And, the truth is that you can gather all the knowledge and advice of other people living the life you think you want, follow it completely, and be completely miserable or fail. Each person needs to figure out the right mixture for him/her that aligns priorities, skills and goals.
Thanks for the words Audrey, of course you know I agree with you 😉