Three years ago, during the last semester of my senior year in college, I hit the job hunt hard. Almost every weekend, I drove home for a job interview, looking for that perfect web/Flash developer position waiting for me in Chicago. And there were a few offered to me. I accepted one that sounded great. Mission accomplished.
And then I graduated from college, moved back home, and BAM!
A really depressing thought descended on me: I would be sitting behind a desk from Monday to Friday for the next 40+ years. The only days I could take a break were the days my employer designated as holidays or the days they’d so graciously given me as vacation time. Or I could just get sick. A lot.
The template was awaiting me. So far I had progressed perfectly. I’d successfully completed grade school, middle school, high school, and college, and had successfully secured a well paying entry level job in my career path of choice.
But then what?
Life. That’s what. That really depressing thought turned out to be the most liberating thought I’d ever had up until that point. I realized I now had the rest of my life to do what I pleased with. A wide open canvas full of opportunity.
Sound too mushy for you?
Too bad. It’s the truth.
And it’s not just me. It’s you, it’s my brother still in college, it’s my own future children. Life after school is what we make of it. Nothing more, nothing less.
You don’t have to get a corporate job after college.
You don’t have to find the love of your life after college.
You don’t have to dread Mondays every week of your life after college.
But you can. That’s the beauty of it. It’s entirely up to you. And there isn’t a right or wrong answer. If any of those three things sound like something you’d love to be doing, then absolutely go do it. The point is that it’s up to you, not the template.
For me, the untemplated lifestyle means doing what I love. And what I love doesn’t have to be what you love, or what your father loves, or what your grandmother loves. I’m married now, starting a family, and buying a house.
Does that mean I’ve sold out and fallen back into the template?
Absolutely not. It means I’m doing what I love, with those that I love. For me, that means I’ll be able to go to the planetarium on a beautiful Wednesday afternoon with my wife and kid. Or we’ll be able to go on a short vacation to Michigan during the week, if we want.
For me, it means I can live.
Isn’t that what it’s all about?
Glad to have been of some inspiration to ya, Monique! I agree, it’s time to take control of what you want to happen with your life, your career, your family. That blank canvas ahead of you is yours and totally open to whatever marks you want to give it.
Thanks for the comment!
Awesome post! I wished I had realized the “template lifestyle” sooner but instead of sulking I am taking action! This post is very inspiring and a part of me wants to show it to my parents when I break the news to them that I will be walking away and never turning back. It’s time that we take control over our lives while we are able to walk around without a cane!
Part of me absolutely regrets the going to college bit… I’d be much more free if I didn’t than if I did, because now after I graduate I *have* to make a decent amount of money. (Student loans won’t be paying themselves, though I wish they would.)
That said, I’ve got about a year to try and establish a freelancing business for myself to rake in some cash, otherwise I’m gonna end up breaking down and finding a supplemental job. Which I may have to be okay with, even if I don’t want to be.
Then again, if I work at one of these “normal” jobs for a few years, I may be able to roust up enough money to pay off my loans AND buy my first Ferrari. Hmmmm…. Those are my “by 30” goals, anyhow. 😉
Those sound like some good goals. 🙂 I think the important part is you’ve determined what you might want and what you want to try, and you’re doing it. You’re flexible enough to adapt as needed.
Thanks for the comment!
Great Post! It’s so inspiring to think that we have our whole lives to do whatever we please with. This was a good reminder of that since it’s easy to get caught up in what we should be doing and the life we think we should be living. Thanks!
It is inspiring, isn’t it?? So many students dread the end of college and the start of “the real world”. I think it should be the opposite. There’s no “real world”. You should be excited to graduate and begin creating whatever you want for the blank slate that is the rest of your life post school.
Getting caught up in what we “should be doing” is easy. At the time of writing this post, I was in the process of buying a house with my wife. But then we realized it wouldn’t work out for us at this moment, so we’re not. Society would probably suggest that you should buy a house when you’re married and expecting your first child, but if that doesn’t work for you, then that’s not what you should do.
Thanks for the comment Nailah!
Amen, there’s too much social pressure to buy a house! It may or may not make sense for you. I rent because it saves me a lot of money over buying and I don’t have to cut the lawn 🙂
Cheers to everything in the above post! Quitting my 9-5 job to pursue something I love was the best decision I’ve ever made. Yay to living the “untemplated” life!
Yay! Good to hear. 🙂
Even if you would’ve decided the 9-5 was for you and it made you happy, the important part is that you figured out what works for you and what enables you to truly live. Kudos to that and thanks for commenting!
Good for you for finding something you love Tim! I spent most of my twenties doing the grad school/career thing, but I realized I don’t like having a boss. I do better with my own business. I let go of the desire to follow a career path that others like and admire when it doesn’t suit me.
I was never into the grad school idea, never really appealed to me. I’m also the same way with a boss. I find I work better managing myself.
Thanks for commenting!
Tim,
Thanks for this encouraging post today. I believe so often in college we’re force fed the idea of having to pursue a job in Corporate America. Sitting behind a desk isn’t for everyone, but few accept that fact and do something about it. Keep pushing others to do what they love.
Jordan,
I totally agree with you about being force fed that idea. There’s definitely some conditioning that happens throughout schooling, and in my case, even happened a little bit with my parents. Granted, they only want the best for me, but for my parents generation, the best (and the only thing really) was to go to college, get a full time job (with benefits), work, then retire.
You’re right – sitting behind a desk isn’t for everyone. There are so many jobs out there that don’t involve office politics or 9-5 or copies or TPS reports that I don’t think many people get the chance to experience.
Thanks for commenting Jordan!
I enjoyed your post today. It really is all about living. Because I think along the same lines as you, I’m always amazed at how many people I meet that are living their life as they want– working the 9-5 and are very happy doing so. Just goes to show, as long as you’re living your own life the way you want, then you can be happy.
Right on, Chris! I think many people are conditioned to believe there’s a certain way things are supposed to work out after school, and I think we all realize quickly that in life, shit just happens.
Thanks for commenting!
Great post Tim! I’ve found one of the more obnoxious things in my dealings with people since I left school is they look at the choices I’ve made as some sort of failure because it doesn’t mirror their own or what’s allegedly “normal”. There is no “right way” and if there was, it’d be called “the path” and we’d all be wearing silver jumpsuits. Nice job dude.
The most ironic part of that is the people looking at you as though you have failed are often the people that are most unhappy with their own situation. I’ve falled into that myself once or twice before, in terms of judging people because their choices don’t mirror my own. But there’s no reason for that at all, as we each make the choices that are right for us.
Thanks for dropping by man!
While our paths were completely different, I feel the same way. I started my corporate career directly after high school (i.e. 4 days after) and tried to fit school in. Unsuccessfully, I might add. But the point being that both options have been, and always will be, available if I choose to take them. And one certainly isn’t any better than the other.
“And one certainly isn’t any better than the other.”
Exactly! I know plenty of successful (success being what they consider it) people who never went to college. It’s one option, for sure, but it’s not THE option.
Thanks for commenting Andrew, and I hope we get to grab a beer (or Texan food) again sometime soon!
It’s pretty exciting to have the rest of your life ahead of you, isn’t it? I tried a soul-crushing 9-5, then I tried a mashup of jobs and freelance, then I found a non-soul-crushing 9-5 that I like and still keep doing the freelance…which is what worked best for me. I can’t take the corporate, but I love the library work atmosphere. 🙂
It’s a good thing, too, that we’re not all meant to do things the same way, otherwise nothing else would get done.
I love that you found a hybrid of the two that works for you. That sums up exactly my point right there!
Yes, it is extremely exciting to have your whole life ahead of you. I think we need to do more to instill that in students in college and even high school. Thanks for commenting Mrs. Micah! (such a mysterious name…)